mother-fricker: remember when penny wore a hijab and dijonay called it a do-rag because i do
oxblood: Everything seems to be in order here.
chickensandwich: dumb ass ripped his perfectly good shirt
the-absolute-funniest-posts: This post has been featured on a 1000notes.com blog.
Me on the phone: Yeah I’m going to be late to work today. Supervisor: Why? Me: There’s a cat gang bang happening on top of my car. Supervisor: (silence) Supervisor: Well can’t you break it up? Me: Who am I to break up a cat gang bang? They’ve probably been organizing it for days on Craigslist. Supervisor: Good point. See you when you get here.
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